Not About Revenge
by ClockwerkOrange
Summary: Tak. Her life was ruined; her future in the Empire was crushed. The one responsible? Zim. Now that she's broken out of prison, she only has one chance to accomplish her goal, and she's not afraid to use force. Only... it's not about revenge. It never was.
1. Hello

**Dedicated to Kam.  
You're probably still out there.  
Somewhere.**

**~CWO  
**

"_You SLIME! I'll tear your eyes out. I'll do it! I'm insane!" she roared, advancing quickly on her retreating foe._

"_I'm not backing up out of fear!" Zim shouted._

_Pause. "I didn't ask why you were backing up."_

_Earlier that day…_

"_So, what you're saying is…_" Red said, tapping his index fingers together in an awkward manner, _"…humans have an entire aisle for canned goods?"_

While Zim was nodding his head eagerly to his favorite two leaders to talk to in the galaxy, he heard a faint beeping.

"_Oh, Zim, we have another c-…_" Purple was cut off by the speaker.

"_My Tallest!"_ someone yelled. The Tallest were looking at the corner of the screen, and Zim slumped down in his chair, realizing that they were looking at some sort of picture-in-picture person. He stared at the ceiling.

"_Whoa, whoa, whoa, guy. We can hear you. Don't yell at the monitor_," Red muttered. "_What is it?_"

"_I'm from prison block B-192 on Vort!" _the other caller exclaimed.

"_Okay,_" Purple said with a nod of his head. "_That's great. Good for you."_

Zim glanced at the monitor. _For what reason would a prison guard call the Tallest themselves_, he wondered. _Unless…_

"…_It was someone real important that escaped!"_

That had Zim's attention. Someone had escaped from a maximum security Vortian prison, and he'd be among the first Irkens to know about it!

Red and Purple were staring at the corner of the screen where the guard most likely was. Red wiggled his hand for the guard to continue.

"_It was that Tak girl from the whole snack-planet catastrophe._"

_WHAT?_

"_What?_" Purple and Red exclaimed in unison.

Zim straightened up. "Erm, my Tallest?" Zim wanted to ask several questions. Why was Tak in a Vortian prison? Why was she sentenced to go to prison anyway? How did she get back to Irken Empire-controlled space? How could she possibly have escaped?

Red shot Zim a glare. "_We're kind of busy…_" he growled.

Zim decided to ask the most obvious question. "Pardon me, my Tallest, but for what reason was Tak placed in a prison?" Zim asked, with what he hoped would be interpreted as a humble, yet innocently curious expression.

"_What, you don't know?_" Red asked, genuinely confused.

Zim remained silent, but when he realized that the question wasn't rhetorical, he shook his head.

Red paused for a moment. "_Well, she fled from her assignment without permission, went to a planet that already had a, uh… invader… on it, attacked a fellow Irken, committed an drastic, unauthorized act on a planet, and – even though the people on your planet were idiots and didn't notice – she basically showed off Irken technology to an entire spacefaring – and armed – civilization." _He took a deep breath. _ "Need I go on?_"

"Apologies for my rude interjection, my Tallest," Zim replied simply.

"_Thank you,_" Red growled, and continued his conversation with the guard.

Zim sank back into his chair. Tak had escaped from a maximum security prison. She was wanted for outstanding crimes, and she had to have known that before she broke out…

She had just ruined what was left of her life. Why?

Revenge…?

Zim leapt up. "Attention, guardy-person!" he yelled.

While the Tallest stared at him blankly, he waited for a response.

"_Who's this?_" the guard asked.

"I'm the Tallest's other call."

"_Oh, great. How you doing?_"

"How interesting. How did Tak escape the prison?"

"_Well, we think that she managed to latch onto a pipe on the ceiling of her cell, and once the guard noticed that she was missing, went in. She attacked him. After that, we're pretty sure she snuck out through the ventilation system. We lost so many good employees…_"

"_Tak killed armed security guards with her bare hands?_" Purple asked breathlessly.

"_Oh, no. Gid, Zik, and Octavius quit._"

While Red was mouthing "Octavius?" to Purple, Zim was thinking to himself.

_If she comes here…_

…_When… she comes here…_

_Later that day…_

"Ah, hideous monkey school-prison," Zim said cheerfully as he walked into his homeroom class. He watched the dangerously happy Ms. Amber smile blankly at him. He slowly continued walking to his desk.

"Good _morning_, class!" Ms. Amber squeaked, with the massive smile still plastered on her face.

A few people mumbled, "Good morning."

Dib made a "Psst" sound at Zim. Zim glanced over. Dib made an exaggerated silent laughing action at him. Zim faced forward again.

_Dib._ How Zim hated the _Dib._ Even now, in high school, Dib continued to thwart every plan that Zim came up with. Except the heat seeking cupcake plan… but, that didn't really count. After all, getting covered in icing was annoying; not lethal. Zim let his thoughts flutter from Ms. Amber's inane speech on kitties, and onto yesterday's failure. _Failure_, he repeated mentally, over and over. _Failure, failure, failure… _It had been a wonderful plan. If he was able to launch Irken firebomb missiles to the poles of the Earth, the resulting super-tsunami would be enough to wipe out all civilization on the entire planet. Since he had no missiles, he decided that he would instead go with his second plan: turn animals into mind-controlled slaves of the Irken Empire! Zim thought that would be a pretty good plan, seeing as the first one would have destroyed the planet, not conquered it. Unfortunately, Dib, in his usual roundabout way of doing it, finally managed to convince the animals that violence was not the answer, and that they could be happy and free in the forests and meadows instead of slaves to the Irken regime. He even went so far in his _pig… evil… _to introduce the woodland creatures to guitars, protest songs, tie dye shirts, floral print headbands, and Volkswagen buses.

_Stupid Dib._

Zim slumped down in his desk, and vaguely heard the teacher spout some nonsense about how unicorns _could_ have existed in pre-Roman Empire times, and after the Second Triumvirate collapsed, Augustus Caesar led a campaign against the "horned menace", but then…

_Ringringring… Ringringring…_

"Oh, uh, sorry," Ms. Amber said, and then hurried to her desk to pick up the classroom's phone. "Yes?"

There was a pause as Ms. Amber listened to whoever was on the other line speaking for a moment.

"Another one?"

Zim quickly straightened up and stared at the teacher. Unbeknownst to him, Dib was curiously looking at Zim, and then the teacher, wondering what was wrong.

However, Zim knew what was wrong. He knew _exactly _what was wrong.

"Alright," Ms. Amber continued in her energetic and constantly over-pleasant voice, "Is she on her way?"

_No,_ Zim thought, claws gripped tight on his desk. They were making small indentations in the fake wood through his gloves. Since Dib was sitting behind Zim, diagonally to the right, he couldn't see that Zim was practically attacking his desk, but he could see how tensed up he was getting. Zim was staring, motionless as granite, at the classroom door.

"Okay." Ms. Amber hung up.

_Knock knock._

Zim was frozen, except for his head, and he tracked a student as he stood up, and opened the door. A girl walked in.

"Hi, Ms. Amber," she greeted.

"Julie?" Ms. Amber asked, to which the girl – Julie – nodded.

Julie took a piece of paper out of her pocket. "Yeah, I forgot that I needed your signature to be checked out early today."

"Oh, it's fine. I'll do that now."

"Thank you."

Ms. Amber scribbled her signature on the slip, and then returned it to the girl, who promptly left.

Zim sighed.

_Knock knock._

The same student proceeded to open the door, yet again.

"Julie, what is-…" Ms. Amber began.

"Julie?" another girl asked curiously, walking into the classroom in a slow, restrained, postured style. Zim's eyes focused on her shoes. She had boots. They were thin, but military-grade. His gaze drifted up. She was wearing simple black pants… his eyes drifted up further. She was wearing an odd shirt, longer in the back than in the front, with dark purple and pinkish purple stripes. There was a symbol on her shirt – a circle above an upside down equilateral triangle. He stared into her purple eyes. They stared back.

"My name's Tak."

She had a wide, pleasant smile on her face.

"I'm new here."


	2. Green

Ms. Amber smiled. "Ah, Tak. They just called about you."

"Yes… I've had quite the _rush_ in getting here…" Tak remarked.

"Oh?"

"Yes…" she looked around, and saw a few familiar faces from middle school – apart from Zim's, of course. "Well, my father's the president of the Deelishus Weenie Corporation. The company jet went down over the Pacific ocean, with me, him, and a few aides on it." She suddenly developed a mile-long gaze. "We crashed on a desert island. We had nothing to eat except coconuts, and sea urchins. It wasn't so bad, seeing as one of our aides was a chef. We had sea urchin kebabs, coconut soup, coconut shakes, coconut over sea urchin, sea urchin marinated in coconut, coconut sea urchin kebabs, sea urchin soup – with coconut, and sea urchin soup without coconut, which, when you think about it, is just sea urchin. Well, a cruise ship showed up and we all came back here, safe and sound. Isn't that great? Isn't that a _wonderful story?_"

"What a wonderful story!" Ms. Amber said in delight. "You're so inspirational."

"We're already negotiating the movie rights," Tak added with a smirk.

"Right, well… why don't you take the empty seat behind Zim?"

"That would be great," Tak said, and slowly walked over. She smiled happily at Zim, and twirled into the seat behind him.

She might as well have pulled a gun on him.

He stood completely still, and stared forward in silence for the rest of the period.

_Beeeeeeeeeep._

"Oh, by the Tallest," Zim breathed, and stood up quickly.

"Hello, Zim."

Zim turned, and faced Tak. Her violet eyes were focused intently on his contacts. Zim worked his expression into an uninterested frown, which Tak began to laugh at. Zim stared at her blankly for her laughing spell, and when she was done, she tousled his hair for a moment. When she let go, her expression went acidic. "You and I are going to be in touch _really often_ from now on, _Zim,_" she said, voice laced with poison. Zim stepped aside for her to pass, and she breezily exited the classroom.

"Zim!"

Zim turned, and this time faced Dib. "What do you want?" he growled.

"Th-that's _Tak!_"

"And?"

"_AND?_" Dib shouted. Ms. Amber peeked at them from behind her computer. "Sorry, Ms. Amber," he said.

"You boys better hurry to class, now," Ms. Amber suggested.

Dib motioned with his eyes for Zim to carry out the conversation in the hallway. Thanks to the sick cosmic jokes the universe likes to play on people, Zim's locker was right next to Dib's.

"Yes, it's Tak," Zim continued. "She was arrested after getting back to Empire-controlled space." He finished turning the lock mechanism, and opened his locker.

Dib stared blankly at Zim, waiting for him to go on.

"Apparently the Tallest didn't think that abandoning her post and doing all the stuff she did was in the best interests of the Empire. She was thrown in jail, and managed to escape just recently – I'd wager a week ago at the most."

"Why?" Dib asked.

"'Why'?" Zim repeated. "Why did she come back? Isn't it obvious?"

"Yeah, you sent her spiraling off into space," Dib said with a chuckle. "She's _mad_ at you."

"You helped," Zim said flatly. "Your sister helped, too."

Dib frowned, but then shrugged. "What do we do?"

"Have you noticed how insane she is?" Zim asked quietly. "And who said that I would ever work with _you?_"

"Well, every time something happens that threatens both my world and your mission, you always seem to turn all heroic for a day or so," Dib said in a matter-of-fact tone.

"One of these days, Dib-cactus, I should leave your planet to rot."

"Great! Why don't you leave tomorrow?" Dib asked with a smile.

Zim slammed his locker and set off for his next class. Luckily, Tak wasn't in that one. After that period and the period after it ended, the lunch bell rang.

Zim went through the cafeteria line like the rest of the good little government sheep, and got a tray full of pristine generic prepared-food goo.

"Goo, my favorite," Zim said, when he had received the tray.

"It's a hot dog," the 'food preparation technician' (Judging by her nametag) barked.

Zim nodded for a few seconds. "So… it's goo."

The food preparation technician shrugged.

Zim picked out a few generic side items, and then sat down at his usual, thankfully still-empty table. Empty, that is, until Tak plopped down right across from him.

"Mmm!" she said. "That looks _good_!"

Zim stared at his 'food'. "No. It doesn't."

"Where's mine?" Tak asked, completely ignoring Zim's remark. She snatched the bright green apple – the only decent food item on the tray – and held it in her hand. Zim stared at her with an unconcerned expression. She took a quick bite out of it, and coughed. "Only burns a little. Must be 'organic'," she commented. She eyed the bitten fruit. "Now, what else is green and has skin that pierces easily…?"

"The great Zim is not amused by your empty threats, _Tak," _Zim spat. "I ruined your life. _Big deal!_ You should have sucked it up and stayed in prison for abandoning your duty to the Empire." Zim stood up and tried to give her a menacing expression.

Tak nonchalantly took another bite out of the apple. "That reminds me," she said, raising both eyebrows as if she really had remembered something. She stood up slowly, and then swiftly punched Zim in the jaw. Zim staggered backward, but didn't fall. After gaining his balance, he clutched the throbbing side of his face, and glared at Tak. She was grinning, and students were staring. She turned around, and walked exactly in the opposite direction, tossing her apple up and catching it. Zim, seething with hatred, sat back down and stared at his food. Everyone continued their conversations, except they were more focused on the episode they had just seen instead of whatever inane thing they were discussing previously.

Dib sat down at Zim's table.

"Here to gloat?" Zim asked simply.

"Uh, no. What the hell is her problem?" Dib asked, glancing back at Tak, who happened to be sitting at her own table pretty far away, still playing with the stolen apple.

"Zim's very own worst enemy taking pity on him," Zim growled. "What is the meaning of this… _insanity_?"

"Why'd you move?" a familiar voice asked, sitting down next to Dib. "Not that I _care_ or anything."

Zim glanced at the newcomer. _Gaz._ Apparently she was a genius, so she was bumped up a grade during middle school. Too bad her personality was still so bitter.

"I'm trying to find out what that alien girl's planning," Dib muttered.

"By asking the alien?" Gaz asked with mock skepticism. "Great idea."

"You're not helping," Dib added.

Zim glared at Tak from across the room. She was still nibbling on the apple. "She's toying with me."

Dib glanced at Zim. "What?"

"She's just _toying_ with me!" Zim repeated. "She _dares_ to toy with one as mighty as Zim?"

If a light bulb had appeared above Zim's head, and turned on, it wouldn't have seemed out of place.

"I know… I'll just tell the Tallest that she showed up here, and then…" He chuckled.

"Um. Great," Dib said. "Why didn't I think of that?"

"Brain worms," Zim suggested.

"I agree," Gaz added.

_The Tallest will see to this… unpleasantness._


	3. Body Heat

"Just one more class with _her_…" Zim muttered, stepping out of the locker room. He briefly smoothed out his gym shirt. "Then… I'll just have to let the Tallest know…"

"Alright, get on the wall," Coach Keenan ordered to everyone in general.

Zim glanced at his classmates lined up to the right of him down the corridor bordering the gym, and then at the coach who was writing on the attendance record. There were about thirty other students in his class, and it was pretty much evenly broken between girls and boys.

"Basketball today," Keenan said, scribbling something on the clipboard again. He ducked into his office, and emerged with one less clipboard, and with one more red bag full of basketballs. He pushed through the door to the actual gym, and tossed it on the floor.

"Zim," Dib greeted me flatly.

"Dib," Zim returned.

"Hi," Kiwi said.

On the days that the class wasn't assigned groups to play in – usually, they played basketball on those days – Dib and Zim played with a skinny, sickly girl named Kendl and a diminutive Japanese boy who, surprisingly, was one of the best basketball players in the class. He didn't speak much English, and while wondering if he knew what they were talking about, people referred to him as Kiwi – his real name was Kiyoshi. Dib and Zim played on opposing teams. Always.

"Is Kendl absent?" Zim asked.

Kiwi nodded.

"Obviously," Dib said dryly.

Zim grimaced. "Shut up."

Dib frowned. "Is, uh… Tak in this cl-…"

"What about me?" an all-too-familiar voice asked, and wormed her way into the group. She nodded at each of them individually. Dib glared at the wood flooring, and then at Tak.

"What?" Dib asked.

"I distinctly heard you say my name, _Dib,_" Tak spat. Still maintaining her sour disposition, she revealed the object that she had hidden behind her back.

"You're kidding, right?" Dib asked, staring blankly at the basketball.

"No, I'm not. I'd like to play the game of basketball," she said flatly. "You should be grateful that you have a use to me, otherwise, I'd dispose of you accordingly."

"Alright, great," Dib said with a smile, rubbing his hands together. "Who's up for some basketball?"

"Pathetic Dib," Zim said flatly.

Tak glanced at me. "Don't _you_ want to play?"

"Play?" Zim glared at her with a firm expression. "Your life has been ruined twice by me – Zim! For what reason do you maintain this… _idiotic_ masquerade? If you want retribution for your pathetic life, then get on with it!"

Tak and Zim exchanged powerful glares for around fifteen seconds, with Dib and Kiwi glancing between them.

Tak's expression of pure hate gave way to a self-satisfied smirk. "That part comes later."

Dib frowned. "Do you know how to play?"

"I observed the study guide," Tak said flatly.

"Oh, er…" Dib said.

Tak held the ball in front of her. "Which of you will be my teammate?"

Dib and Zim stared at each other.

"I'm not-…" they said in unison, and then grimaced.

"Okay," Kiwi said while moving next to Tak.

Zim and Dib now grimaced at being on the same team, but considered the alternative to be worse.

"I'm required to 'check' the ball now," Tak muttered. She passed it swiftly to Dib, who caught it – sort of – and tossed it back. "Now, with the 'checking' courtesy completed…" she ducked out of the way, and swiftly shot up the half court they were playing on. Dib ran after her while Zim stood next to Kiwi. "This is easy!" she yelled back. Tak shot the ball, and it circled the hoop before bouncing out. "_What?_"

"'This is easy'!" Dib repeated. He dribbled the ball back out into the court.

"I blame your planet's gravity," Tak muttered, coming at him slowly. When Dib glanced behind him, she swiped at the ball, and Dib couldn't jerk it away fast enough. It spun away, and Kiwi picked it up and began dribbling it back toward the net. While Zim was charging after him, Tak casually walked in front of him, causing him to skid to a halt in a vaguely cartoonish fashion. He tried to go around her, and she moved to continue blocking his path. He tried the other way, and she did the same. He glared at her, and then did a fake out left, but went right. "Shoot," Tak suggested.

Kiwi tossed the ball, and it swished perfectly through the net.

"Fantastic work, Zim," Dib said, and punched Zim's shoulder.

Zim glared at him. "Do that again, _human_, and your arm's coming _off._"

Dib shrugged, and managed to react just in time to catch the ball that Kiwi had thrown at him. Dib threw it back, and Kiwi returned it again. Dib looked at the net like he was going to shoot it from there, but Zim walked behind him slowly, and Dib unceremoniously handed it off. Zim quickly got slightly closer to the net, but Tak had already popped up. Zim glanced back at Dib, who was trying to get away from Kiwi. Zim spun around, and attempted to duck past Tak, but she tried swiping at the ball. Zim pulled away slightly, but she persisted.

"Just give up, Zim. I'm sure you'll make at least one point, eventually," she said with a smirk.

Zim ignored her statement, and instead chose to try and power his way past her. He pushed into her slightly, and tried to dodge her swipe. She missed, and he continued running down the court, dribbling the ball all the way. He tossed the ball, and it made it. Dib, exhausted, grinned.

After checking the ball again, and proceeding to the next play, Dib and Zim, and Tak and Kiwi, were pretty much evenly matched. The final score was five to five, but while Dib and Kiwi seemed pretty interested about it, Zim – and possibly Tak – wasn't concerned. Zim, at least, was too busy replaying the last part of the game in his mind. Zim was about to shoot, but stumbled, and Tak's right shoulder to her neck bonked his head. While in his "Oh, it appears as though I am falling," panic, Tak's "Oh, it appears as though someone is falling on me," reflexes set in, and she tried to hold Zim back from taking her down with him. Her hands – her bare hands, to help with gripping the ball – were on Zim's chest and neck. Once Zim was righted, Tak sidestepped out of the way, momentarily forgetting the game. She recovered quickly.

It seemed insignificant at first, but it wasn't. The subtle difference in their body temperatures accented the feeling of the skin-on-skin contact. Tak _seemed_ unfazed, but there was a line between completely – and _purposely – _ignoring an awkward situation, and not minding it.

Zim had twitched at the sickly feeling of someone else having their hand on him, especially one of his worst enemies, and especially at such close of a range. He gripped the collar area of his shirt, and rubbed the place where Tak had touched. It didn't help.

Irkens just weren't accustomed to such things.


	4. Deal with the Devil

**[Author's Note: **

**The plot.  
It thickens.**

**~ClockwerkOrange]**

Zim was leaning on the brick wall that formed the exterior of the cafeteria part of the school building. Several students were milling about, or standing in small groups, chatting. Somewhere along the way, Zim had decided that he'd rather use the school's bussing system than walk home every day. He was regretting his decision, seeing as the bus was already ten minutes late. Still, the time mostly alone gave him a mostly quiet interlude to think. Tak had returned, that was obvious – she had returned, but she hadn't attacked Zim. Then again, she didn't attack Zim straight away the first time she showed up, either. She had toyed with him, which was what she was most likely doing right then. Was she trying to lull him into a false sense of security? Ridiculous! The fact that she had broken out of prison and gone straight to Earth – even if she abused the time warps – was proof enough that she had a _serious_ reason to be there… and it just so happened that her worst enemy lived on the planet. What was she trying to prove by her little charade? Everything seemed illogical… unless, of course, she had gone insane.

Zim fidgeted. It was always awkward to lean against a wall for a long period of time with a PAK on. He heard an engine, and glanced to his left. At the end of the sidewalk framed by grass, his bus had shown up. He and several other students boarded it, and sat down in their usual places. Zim sat near the middle, always on the left side, which was where he was sitting today. He sat down, and tried to half-stretch in the mildly confined space. Buses weren't exactly the crowning achievement of human ingenuity.

"Black in black, I hit the sack," someone sang. "I've been too long, I'm glad to be back… let loose, from the noose…" The singing degraded into humming when she fluidly sat next to Zim.

"Tak," Zim acknowledged bitterly.

Tak's humming faded as the bus began moving. "Zim," she mirrored. She didn't look at Zim, but she pulled her legs up, and scooted down a bit in the seat, so that she could curl up. Zim stared at her blankly as she closed her eyes, and appeared to drift off to sleep after a few minutes. Zim continued looking at her with the same vacant expression on his face. Her chest was rising and falling in a slow, steady pattern. She was asleep.

_Why is she making me so furious?_ Zim asked himself. _Falling asleep in front of me? What trickery is this?_

Zim ran through the possibilities. Some kind of crude show of how she believed Zim wouldn't harm her? Naturally, he wouldn't – not on a bus full of witnesses. Was she trying to… well, was she just tired?

_I'd be tired, too, if I broke out of a maximum security prison,_ Zim considered. _However, the _amazing _Zim would have found a way to not get arrested in the first place! _He paused, and sniffed the air. _…Blueberries? _He looked around curiously for the source of the scent, until he stared stupidly at Tak's holographic hair. His eye twitched. _It's blue_…_ and holographic,_ he added. Still, he had to make sure. He leaned slightly closer to Tak. The scent intensified. _Yes,_ he stated mentally. _It was her. She smells like blueberries. _He slowly moved away, and settled back into his original sitting position. He frowned.

The brakes of the bus hissed. Zim glanced out of the window. They had stopped at the road that branched off into Zim's cul-de-sac. Zim was about to stand, but remembered that Tak was there.

"Tak," he muttered.

No response.

"Tak!" he hissed.

Still no response.

He gingerly prodded her shoulder. Her eyes opened slowly, and she glanced at Zim with a disoriented expression.

"Move," Zim suggested.

She quickly donned her best sarcastic smirk, and hopped out of the seat, gesturing her arms for Zim to stand up. Zim did, and quickly exited the bus. He started down the sidewalk as quickly as he could without looking back. He arrived at his house, quickly keyed in a password on the invisible keypad in the door, and walked in, shutting the door behind him.

"Yay!" GIR squealed, bouncing over to Zim, squeaking all the way.

"Hello, GIR," Zim said in a professional tone.

GIR looked like he was about to explode. Figuratively. "I found the kitty!"

Zim stared at GIR. "You found the what? Answer me, GIR! _Answer meeeeee!_" he demanded, picking up the little green dog disguise wearing dog.

_Beep beep beep beep._

Zim looked back at the door, just in time to see it open and Tak to step in.

Zim put GIR back on the ground. "You _dare_ enter my base? Leave immediately!" he shouted. "You followed me home? How did you even get through the door? _Tell Zim…!_"

"You didn't even bother to change the security pin from the default one…" Tak grimaced. "Zim, I'm going to tell you why I'm here." Her SIR unit slipped in through the door just after her, in cat form.

"There's the kitty!" GIR yelled.

Tak breezed right past Zim, and sat down on his couch. She yawned. Zim stared at her intently.

"I have a proposition," Tak said flatly. "You can accept it or refuse it."

Zim paused, and waited for her to continue. Different ideas popped into his mind during the brief moment where she was silent.

"I'm going to give you a week to prove that you can conquer this disgusting rock," she growled. "If you fail my test, I'm going to take over it myself."

Zim's brain nearly exploded. "Pff! What about me? Do you think I'll let you steal _my_ mission?"

"_Your_ mission?" Tak repeated with wide eyes. Her expression contorted into one of pure rage. "To answer your question, _invader_, I'd probably just kill you!"

"You make it sound like you could! Don't forget how I stopped you _last_ time!" Zim shouted.

Tak's jaw clenched so tightly, that it looked like she could chew through her own teeth. She balled her hand into a fist, and stood up slowly. Zim didn't change his proud expression, but reluctantly took a step backward. That set her off.

She glared at him, and then began raging. "You _SLIME_! I'll tear your eyes out. I'll do it! I'm insane!" she roared, advancing quickly on her retreating foe.

"I'm not backing up out of fear!" Zim shouted.

Pause. "I didn't ask why you were backing up."

"Oh… well…" Zim mumbled. "I don't care!"

Tak got closer to him, and grabbed him by the head. "You're either going to take my little deal, or accept a cancelation prize."

Zim pulled out of the uncomfortable grip, and then glared at her. He was backed against the wall, but he was still trying to maintain his cool. "Don't you mean 'consolation' prize?"

"No," Tak said, disguise suddenly flickering away. Her flinty purple eyes eyed him like he was an insect. She continued backing up into the wall until she was practically on top of him. She pressed the pointy tip of her index finger between Zim's eyes. "I mean 'cancelation'." She let her arm drop. She eyed him suspiciously. "So?" she breathed.

Her breath smelled sweet, and suddenly Zim became aware of the fact that he was, indeed, being pressed up to a wall by one of his worst enemies. He absently noticed her subtle body heat, and practically shuddered. Too close.

"Answer," she demanded. Her flinty expression lessened. "…Well?"

"I agree to the terms of your petty agreement," Zim muttered, still distracted by the situation he was in.

"That's wonderful news," Tak chirped. "Now, I won't have to kill you today." She backed off, and started for the front door. "Come, MiMi."

MiMi followed Tak as she left. The door slammed shut behind her, and it seemed as though she had never been there at all.

"Scary purple lady's scary!" GIR squealed. He started running in circles.

She had left. She had demanded he accept an insane, stupid deal that he had no business in agreeing to, and she had… so close…

Perhaps she could have stayed a while longer? The bet was vague. They should have gone over it. It would have only taken a few minutes… she hadn't been very specific about it… should have… elaborated…

For the moment, the all-important event of reporting Tak to the Tallest was forgotten.


	5. Melting

"Puppy-head!" was the first thing Zim heard.

He shook his head, and glanced around. He was on his couch. He stood up, and finally noticed GIR at the front door. "What?" Zim asked flatly. _Puppy-head…?_

GIR finished looking through the peephole, and unlocked the door. While Zim was wondering what the heck was going on, GIR opened the door and let Dib inside.

Recognizing his enemy, Zim yelled, "Computer! _UNLEASH THE CUPCAKES!_"

"Okay," Computer mumbled.

Dib paused, and glanced around. Several hatches opened up on the floor, and pink frosted cupcakes floated slowly out of them. One by one, they turned and faced their frosted sides at Dib. There must have been at least two hundred in all. Suddenly – and wisely – stricken by confusion and fear, Dib began to back up against the now-closed door. He bumped up against it.

The cupcakes emitted a horrifying squeaking sound, and smashed into him in a hideous terror barrage of frosty doom and sweetness. It took about ten seconds for the cupcakes to run out.

Dib, wearing a drab expression, was now pink.

"It works!" Zim squeaked. "It works, it works, and it works! Victory is mine!"

"Uh…" Dib said, completely plastered to the wall by pink frosting. "…Uh…"

He struggled a bit, and eventually broke free of the frosting's grip. He collapsed on the floor, but climbed back up rather quickly. He almost fell over again when his foot slipped over some more frosting. Zim was laughing maniacally all the while. Dib, still a completely pink, human-shaped goo pile, slowly took off his glasses, showing the only part of him that wasn't frosted.

"I… just wanted to know if you… told your people about…" He coughed. "About Tak."

Zim froze. He had forgotten to tell the Tallest about Tak. He should do it immediately!

Right?

"Um… we decided that we would instead do a bet."

"'We'?" Dib asked as he tried to waddle around in his goo-form. He began scraping the frosting from his shirt. "This… why… and cupcakes… what bet?"

Zim sat down on the sofa. "It is of no concern to you."

"Of course it's my concern!" Dib yelled at the television, obviously unable to see between the frosting and his lack of clean glasses.

Zim sighed, and analyzed his options. Sure, he could tell Dib – worst enemy, Dib – about the bet to take over his world, or watch Tak take over his world. For some reason, he wasn't sure if Dib would like it very much. However, in case he failed… well, a week wasn't exactly a large amount of time to take over a planet. After all, he'd just been doing, ah… information retrieval… at present.

"Dib-monkey, listen carefully," Zim muttered. "I've made a bet with Tak that I could take over your planet in a week. If I do not, I expect that she will try whatever plan she has in mind, and possibly remove me from the picture." I paused, waiting for a reaction. When there was none, I continued. "There's always a chance that the mighty Zim could pull off another miracle as he did last time. Now, leave my base before I send more cupcakes after you."

"Take over my planet?" Dib shouted, still facing the television.

"Computer, reload the cupcake distribution hoppers," Zim ordered. Zim grinned as Dib – still wary of the cupcake barrage – trudged out the door, leaving hot pink footsteps behind. "And clean up this mess," he added.

After the computer made a semi-obedient grunt, Zim hopped over the pile of frosting that GIR was now snacking on, popped in his contacts, made sure his wig was on properly, and started out the door to wait for the bus. Upon reaching the end of the road leading into the cul-de-sac, Zim sighed and sat down on the corner of the sidewalk.

_At least I have an opportunity to think_, he thought. His already-unhappy expression deepened. _I've… I've not been able to conquer this pathetic world yet._ He began to nervously tap his foot against the road. _I've been… stopped each time._ His right hand curled up into a fist. _…I – the great Zim – must come to a conclusion. Might I be unable to succeed in this bet?_ Zim exhaled, suddenly aware that he had been holding his breath. _At least tomorrow is Friday.  
_

Zim, hearing an engine louder than the rest of the cars that occasionally went past, glanced up to see the bus on approach. He stood up, and the bus screeched to a halt next to him. He climbed into it, and walked past the bus driver – an elderly man with a mile-long stare – and collapsed into his usual seat. Naturally, Tak slithered next to him.

Zim grimaced in response. "I didn't realize your stop was before mine," he said in a monotonous voice. He looked at her for a moment. Her blueberry hair framed her snow white skin, which, in turn, sharply contrasted with her deep purple eyes – the only thing semi-retained from her original Irken form. "You look nice today."

"Flattery won't excuse you from our bet," Tak growled.

Zim hadn't meant to flatter her, and briefly wondered why he had bothered to say such a silly thing in the first place. Shrugging that off, he stared forward. The seat in front of him had a small puncture in it, no doubt caused by some random idiot who decided to foul something up for no reason, other than the simple fact that he or she could. Suddenly, he felt himself boiling with anger over that tiny, insignificant thing… although, maybe, it wasn't so insignificant after all. Zim's posture slowly melted until his head was touching the window.

"Why didn't you change your disguise since we last… met?" Tak asked, keeping her attention in front of her, instead of at Zim.

Zim was surprised, to say the least. Why would she ask something so pointless?

He avoided looking at her. "I could ask the same of you," he retorted, wary of any unseen implications hidden within her question.

Tak nodded, seemingly satisfied with his answer. Zim glanced at her, and noticed that she was twirling one of her thin, white fingers in her blueberry hair. It seemed to sparkle with each minute movement. _Ah, the wonders of digitally modified matter_, Zim thought. He continued watching, and recalled that those kinds of actions could imply that the person doing them was nervous, or thinking about something.

Zim dropped his gaze. "I have been thinking about our wager." Out of his peripheral vision, he noticed Tak stiffen.

"Oh?" she breathed. She bent over slightly to adjust her left boot.

"Yes."

Tak paused in her adjustments. "Would you like to tell me which part of it you've been thinking about?"

"Before I put my _ingenious_ plan into action, I was wondering if you would like to accompany me for the initial… planning stage."

Tak let her foot drop back down. "I don't see why not."

The bus's breaks hissed, and the door opened. Students began standing and streaming out, with Zim and Tak in the middle of the departing group. While they were leaving, Zim couldn't help but picture Tak, sitting down with a thoughtful expression on her face, twirling her hair that doubtlessly smelled of blueberries.


	6. Sparkle

Ms. Amber's class, again...!

Zim was sitting at his desk in Ms. Amber's classroom, and she – being an English teacher, after all – had suggested that they continue reading _Julius Caesar_. Zim rolled his eyes. It was a story about how an old man becomes disliked, and a few guys – including his best friend – murder him. How utterly _human! _While Zim was reading silently, he couldn't help but notice the sound of Tak flipping pages behind him. It seemed as though she was purposely making more of a sound than she needed to. Suddenly, panic set in.

_Wait, what am I doing?_ Zim asked himself. _My worst enemy sits in the seat behind me, and we speak rationally. I've even made a bet with her!_

Zim gritted his teeth. He couldn't afford to have a nervous breakdown on the spot. However, why hadn't he realized how much of a threat Tak was? Was it because of her non-threatening actions as of late? Perhaps. She was pulling him around by the strings. She knew he couldn't conquer a planet within a week. This was no noble wager to decide who the most deserving one was; this was an excuse to kill. Like shattering glass, that simple conclusion broke into thousands of pieces, and settled across his entire consciousness. It was so painfully obvious, why hadn't he anticipated it? Why hadn't he _prepared?_ Tak wasn't just vicious. She was dedicated. She would rather strangle him than compete in a nice little competition. However… the reason she was doing the bet…

In Zim's case, the teacher's shift from silent reading to a lecture on character development was ignored.

…It was so hideously apparent to him, right at that exact moment. Tak was asserting her dominance – no, that wasn't quite the word… _superiority_ – over him, so that her actions afterward would be even sweeter to her. It would accent her ultimate victory over Zim, who would lay crushed and defeated. Zim was suddenly reminded of her previous escapade.

"…_So you can only watch_ _as I ruin your _life!_"_

That… that… _horrible…_!

"Zim, could you move your head a little? You're in the way," Tak muttered.

_In the way,_ Zim thought, as he slumped down in his seat and rested his head in his arms. He angled himself forward a little bit so he could see the generic diagram on the board, with characters and motives in little boxes. _Heh. Diagrams._

Wait. Of course! He was in the way! After all, Tak _had_ tried taking his mission before. She failed, of course – who would be able to stand up against the mighty Zim?

…And company…

In any case, unless she had a better plan beforehand – which she certainly didn't last time, seeing as her countermeasures consisted of merely deactivating Zim's base – she wouldn't be able to emerge victorious this time. Zim grimaced, facial expression hidden under his arms. She had been in prison, alone, for a long time, perhaps _too _long if one took into account her undeniable intelligence.

_If I had that long to think in solitude, I'd definitely be able to come up with a plan that-…_

Taking over Earth. Their bet.

Damn.

It all came down to that, then, when one thought about it. Whether Zim won or lost, it wouldn't affect what came afterward. Hell, if Zim won, he doubted that Tak would say, "Oh, I see you won, I'll be going now." No. But the time allotted for the bet… that time could be used. _That's_ why everything depended on it. Tak could have just rushed in, killed Zim, began her "mission", and that would have been the end of Zim, but _no._ She had a flair for the dramatic, as proven by her last appearance. She could have done the same thing in that instance – killed Zim right off the bat. It would have been a surprising attack, perhaps even one that the _mighty Zim_ could not detect, or even_ avoid_, but she had chosen the route with more flair, which had proven to be her undoing.

_That could prove to be her undoing in _this_ instance as well…_

Zim mulled over the possibilities, until a stereotypically evil zipper-toothy smile spread across his partially-hidden face. It was the familiar feeling of the beginnings of a plan.

…And a good one, at that.

**(._.)**

"Not hungry?" Tak asked, tapping her fingers on the fake plastic imitation wood. She stared into Zim's eyes with an expression of guarded hostility, but her eyes had a wistful look about them, hidden in their purple-ish-ness.

Zim looked back with a face devoid of amusement. "You know Zim refuses to eat this disgusting meat filth," he replied dismissively. He glared sharply at her, daring her to make some form of snide comment. Her expression was hard as well, and Zim's mind turned black.

_Implying that I'd eat this disgusting meat filth._

_Implying that you don't know that already._

_Implying that you think I should care about what you say._

_Implying that I care what you say…!_

Tak's expression turned playful. "Why get it if you just throw it away?" she asked slyly, giving him a sideways glance through her amethyst eyes.

Zim looked shocked. "What, and expose myself? You'll notice that these pathetic dirt children all consume this… 'food'," he added, staring at the "food" in question with obvious distaste.

She leaned slightly over the table. "Is it less strange that you dump a full tray into the trash every single day?" she asked softly, eyes sparkling with demented glee. She slowly touched Zim's chin. "You're such a child."

Zim broke away from the contact with a sharp, sideways jerk of his head. "What is _wrong_ with you?" he hissed, while his mind worked furiously to cope with what just occurred.

_Implying that I'm not on your level._

_Implying that you are superior to me._

…_You… touched… me…?_

She stared at Zim for a good ten seconds. "Oh, I don't want to start a scene, do I?" she murmured, settling back into her seat.

Zim exhaled.

"I can see that a few people are confused," she said in a matter-of-fact tone. "First, they see the social outcast talking to the returning girl who came over of her own accord. Girl punches him in face, and then departs. Day two: girl sits back down, strokes boy's chin. I hope they're having fun guessing what the hell is going on."

A few of Zim's brain cells may have exploded. "This isn't some kind of game," he hissed, baring his zipper-teeth in her direction.

"Isn't it?" Tak asked, eyes still sparkling in response to some unseen joke. She absently ran her hand through her berry-scented hair, eliciting a grimace from Zim.

Zim stared at her until her gaze drifted back on him. "This is my life. This is my… my _mission._"

"'Your mission'?" Tak repeated, hand frozen in her hair. She laughed her trademark, squeaking laugh. "Oh, Zim. You'll see."

**(._.)**

"Pass me the ball!" Tak screeched, obviously miffed at her 'team' being one point behind Zim's  
"pathetic excuse of a 'worst enemy'," to quote Tak herself.

Tak and Zim were on the same team this time, much to Zim's chagrin. Kiwi and Dib were winning, which was certainly not adding to Tak's ever-present hatred of Zim. It was the last few minutes of the class, and Tak wasn't one to back down in the face of adversity. Upon Zim crowding Kiwi to the point of him passing the ball, Tak intercepted it in midair, and shot it successfully, effectively putting the game into a tie.

_Beep,_ and the bell rang.

Kiwi and Dib silently departed ahead of them, and Zim glanced blankly at Tak. She reflexively stared at him. "Yes?" she asked.

Zim studied her expression. "You are still going to join me in front of my home for the planning stage of my brilliant plan, yes?"

Now it was Tak's turn to study his. "My plans haven't changed," she said flatly. She seemed vaguely suspicious. "I'll be there."

Zim continued walking to the point where the gym exited into the perimeter hall. "At what time?"

"Eight o'clock, I suppose," Tak replied, just in time. They parted at the point where Tak had to go up the stairs to her locker room, and Zim to his.

Zim let a twisted smile spread across his face.

"I see…"

**[Author's Note:**

**Have you noticed (._.)? (._.) will be separating points of the story in which I need to break from one point in time to another without a transition. **

**(._.)**

**Isn't he great? **

**~CWO]**


	7. Bleak

Zim sat down at his usual seat on the bus. He sighed, and tried to ignore the vaguely grimy feeling of the imitation leather. Tak breezed in, and plopped down next to him. Zim worked up the nerve to glance at her, and he noticed that she was staring forward with an expression of utmost concentration on her face. Zim averted his gaze, and instead chose to look out the window. Suburban houses flitted by until the bus stopped at a red light.

"Yeah, I don't know," he heard someone whisper. "Doesn't make sense at _all._"

"I think it's cute," a higher-pitched voice commented. The voice belonged to Zita, who happened to be the only student from Bitters' class that rode the bus in high school.

Zim rolled his eyes. They must have been gossiping about the latest couple that had formed. He continued focusing at the scene blowing past beyond the mildly dirty window after the bus began moving again.

"Well, like I said… she flat out _slugs_ him one day, but she's _with_ him all the time," another gossiping girl muttered.

_How… how _dare_ they! They're talking about _me! Zim thought furiously. His hand clenched into a fist, claws digging into his palm through his glove.

"I wonder if she missed him when she was on that island… they seemed like they were dating back in-…"

The first girl that Zim had heard cut Zita off, "It looked to me like she liked that crazy Dib kid."

"What, the one with the big head? And the crazy? The one that goes to _this_ school?"

"Yeah, that one."

"Weird," the third girl commented.

"Hey, do you think th-…"

Tak suddenly half-stood and turned around. "_IF YOU'RE GOING TO TALK ABOUT ME, YOU MIGHT AS WELL DO IT TO MY FACE!" _Tak shouted, glaring at the schoolgirls around two seats behind us. Zita and a dark-haired girl with glasses looked startled, but the blonde girl with the pixie haircut across from them looked like she was about to have a heart attack. Tak fell back down in her seat, and hung her head tiredly. Everyone on the bus stared at her for a few seconds, but after realizing that she may very well say the same thing to them, they decided to go about their unrelated conversations.

Zim absently toyed with the idea of psychological warfare while she was down, but since the event that had made her angry was something that had infuriated him as well, he decided it might lose some of its impact. That, and she might kill him. He cautiously glanced at her and reevaluated her downcast expression.

"If you _dare_ feel pity for me, I will crush your skull here and now," Tak growled.

Zim's frown deepened. "It is not that I feel _pity_ for you, Tak. It is that you may have just realized why this is not just a game."

Tak's silent fury seemed to dissipate tangibly. "What do you mean?"

The bus's brakes whined as the bus slowed to a halt in front of Zim's cul-de-sac. "We will discuss it. Eight o'clock, correct?" he asked as he stood up to leave.

Tak maintained a sour expression, but she nodded. "Once again, Zim. My plans have not changed."

Zim returned the nod with one of his own, and departed.

**(._.)**

Zim was sitting on his couch with military-quality posture. He glanced at his small Earth-purchased blue-numbered twenty four hour digital clock, and then promptly glanced away.

7:58.

Had asking _her_ to come here been a mistake? Would his plan be flawed, somehow? No, this could be the only chance he had left. He had a contingency plan if it failed, but he'd rather not take the risk. If he was successful that night, then there was always a small chance that things could start going back to normal.

_Whatever "normal" was._

_Ring._

8:00.

Zim stood up, activated the door's one-way transparency, and stared at Tak. He turned it off, and opened the door. "Come in," he said flatly. "This time, try not to destroy my base."

Tak made a small growling sound as she walked in. "I still don't know why I even _bothered_ to show up," she hissed. Once the door was closed behind her, her disguise disappeared. Before then, Zim had only really gotten a brief glimpse of her outside of her false human form since she had returned. He preferred her natural. "So, what's your plan?"

Zim, still standing, quickly grabbed his wig and contacts from the coffee table. He put them on, and faced Tak. "We're leaving for a while."

Tak glared at him, but then shrugged. Her disguise rematerialized in a blink of an eye, and she stood by the door. Zim followed her, and they both left the house.

"I realize that the _great_ Zim may have caused you a great deal of… not good," Zim stated as the door closed behind them. "However, I do not believe that your reasoning in wanting to conquer this planet is just." While Tak stared at him with a flabbergasted expression, Zim carefully studied one of his lawn gnomes.

"What gives you the right… no, the _nerve_ to _dare_ say something so completely and irrevocably _imbecilic_?" Tak yelled.

Zim, only slightly fazed by her reaction, began walking into the cul-de-sac. Tak, curious as she was furious, followed. Zim turned to look at a pale yellow house with a black roof, his expression indiscernible in the dark.

"A family of Latin descent lives there. The father works at night, and the mother works during the day to pay for the oldest daughter's college tuition." He turned to face the next house, a white one with a dark roof nearly the same color as the first one. "A middle-class Caucasian man lives in that unit. He is an artist of sorts, he writes as well as he paints. He has sold a few paintings to general approval, but whenever he attempts to put pen to paper and speak out against the injustices of this planet, he is rebuked for being counterproductive to Earth society."

Zim slowly faced a brick house. "And this, perhaps, the greatest story of them all. The man that lives there with his wife failed to impregnate her for several months. After seeing a human doctor, and dealing with him and his unrefined tests, they came to the conclusion that she was unable to reproduce effectively." Zim paused. "However, he succeeded in impregnating her anyhow, just a few months later. They were overjoyed at the news that she was developing a healthy human worm baby. Seven and one half Earth months later, she had to take a surprise trip to the hospital. Their squishy human smeet had been born, but it had done so in a premature manner, and it was not expected to live much more than seven days. The father detached himself from the situation upon hearing the news, and instead focused on work. Nine days passed, and the original estimate of one week before the smeet's death was proven to be incorrect."

Tak frowned, obviously uncertain of how to process the information that Zim was giving her.

"Still, the human doctor with his chemicals and his ineffective remedies maintained that there was no hope for the smeet; that it would die all the same. The mother was distraught, but the father was once again aloof. More time passed, and the smeet was still relatively healthy for its situation. Finally, perhaps with much feelings of relief, the father of the smeet gave in, and decided that the little being might make it, even if just to spite the world that wished to destroy it. He decided that he would love the small, little thing; love it as a parent should love their offspring. He had finally, finally decided that the only way it _could _pull through is if it had the love that all beings on this planet apparently require." Zim stared at the house for six seconds of sustained silence. Tak didn't say anything.

"They visited the hospital the next day, and the doctor pulled them directly into his office. He told them that the smeet had died in the middle of the night."

Zim glanced at Tak, whose expression was unchanged, even in response to the shocking bluntness at the end of his tale. He waited.

And waited…

…And waited.

"Well?" he asked, staring at Tak.

"'Well', what?" she asked evenly, purple eyes dark and empty in the moonlight. Her hair swished slightly in answer to the small breeze.

"Does that not elicit any unexplainable, foreign psychological response from you?"

"Their offspring perished. It is unfortunate for them," Tak stated in an even tone. "They should have realized that something was wrong with the female, and that they should not have pursued intercourse." She seemed to cast shadows in every direction from the street lights around the cul-de-sac. It gave her an eerie quality.

Zim stared at her for a few seconds. "Yes, well." He closed his eyes, but opened them quickly. "I have news for you."

"Excellent," she replied. "Now we can finally begin whatever you needed me to come for."

Zim narrowed his eyes. "The Dib-cactus stole your ship when I sent you careening into space," he said flatly.

Tak looked like she was about to explode. "_He_ got his grubby little hands on it?" she shouted.

"Yes, yes, the Dib's hands _do_ resemble small grubs," Zim said in his attempt at thinly-veiled sarcasm. Tak seemed to be too irritated to notice. "His house is not far from here. I assume he keeps the ship in his garage. Even after all this time, it will most likely still be there."

Tak glanced at Zim. "M-my ship…?"

Zim frowned. Her eyes were practically glowing from the mention of a cold, hard piece of Irken machinery, but when he had presented one of the most tragic stories ever to befall a member of the already-flawed races of the planet that they were standing on, she had barely acknowledged it.

He snapped back to the present. "Yes. I will guide you to it."

He was secretly glad she was so intent on getting her precious ship back and nothing more. It meant that she wouldn't wonder why her worst enemy was basically giving her a gift, and it would also mean that Zim would be able to find out where her base was.

_Genius._

**[Author's Note:**

**I'm tired. **

**True fact: Tak's eyes are purple. You know who else has purple eyes? Me. Yep. Purple eyes. Seen some kind of generic anime series where one of the main characters or supporting characters had purple eyes? They're real.**

…**When people notice, they make fun of me. :c**

**So tired.**

**~CWO]**


	8. Venom

"What, no lasers?" Tak asked.

"Stupid Dib," Zim replied from next to her in the bush. "I see no lights. Very well! Let us assault the pathetic human worm's home."

Tak made a sound that was a cross between a growl and a mumble, so Zim assumed that meant she would. Zim stepped slowly out of the bush, and Tak did the same. They hurriedly crossed the street, boots tapping rhythmically against the asphalt, and Zim skidded to a halt directly in front of the walk to Dib's house.

Tak slithered up behind Zim. "No one's here, Zim," she reminded him.

"Perhaps," Zim commented, and began to tiptoe across the lawn to the garage. Tak walked after him, and after he paused in front of the garage, Tak sighed.

"Zim, you _do_ have an idea as to how you're going to open the garage door, right?" she asked.

Zim glanced back at her. "Liar!" he squeaked.

"I asked a question," Tak growled.

"How nice! I don't care!" Zim answered. He withdrew a small, pen-shaped device from his pocket, which Tak stared at.

"What is that?"

Zim held it near the garage door, and twisted the end of it. It began to emit a beam of red, glowing light, and the metal of the garage door began to warp and melt from where the laser touched it. Zim carefully made a vaguely Irken-shaped oval in the door, twisted the laser device to its original setting, and stood up from his half-crouched position. He nodded to Tak. "You may have the honor of finishing the handiwork of _Zim._"

Tak kicked the section of the door with the melted, glowing line around it, and it separated from the rest of the metal and clattered to the floor of the garage. It was dark inside, but the two walked in.

Zim fumbled along the side of the wall, and eventually found a light switch, which he promptly turned on. Light flooded the room.

Tak gasped, and Zim turned around.

"W-what did that idiot _do _to it?" Tak asked. It was purple.

Zim stared at it for a few seconds. "What? Don't like purple?"

"Eh, well, I just didn't… it's… well…" Tak said, slowly inspecting the ship. "Inferior human paint."

"Actually," Zim said, closing the gap between the side of the garage and the ship, "I've found that human paint is one of the few things the meaty squish things have gotten right. I don't know if he's used one suitable for reentry, however."

"To think it was purple, after all this time," Tak muttered, now staring through the glass at the inside of the ship.

Zim frowned. "How do you mean that?"

"How do I mean what?" Tak asked sharply, irritated that someone had ruined her moment with the ship. "Well?"

"'After all this time'," Zim repeated, staring at Tak.

At that moment, Tak did something that Zim had never expected her to do. She blushed.

"Ah, well… when I was…_waiting_ to come back here, I did quite a bit of thinking about my… my ship," Tak murmured, glancing around. "And, naturally, I imagined it being the same color as when we were separated."

Zim smirked. "Did you just personify your ship by saying 'we'?"

Tak shot a glare at Zim. "You're an idiot. I refuse to talk to you about anything that is important to me."

Zim blinked. "How dare you!" he shouted, balling his hand into a fist. "I so dearly, dearly wanted to know what you considered important!"

"You're being sarcastic."

Zim smirked again. "Yes. Yes, I am."

"Whatever!" Tak yelled. "Let's just take my ship to base."

Zim smiled. She was falling right into his trap. Like jelly.

"Does your house have enough room for another ship?" she asked gruffly, already climbing into the cockpit.

Zim stared at her. She glanced back up, and shot him a curious expression.

"My house…?" Zim asked. "Weren't we taking it to _your_ base?"

"Ah. My base," Tak said blankly. "Well… it's not… prepared to house a ship."

"So you expect _the mighty Zim_ to dedicate his facilities to holding it?" Zim asked with a grimace. "We are enemies! You are the last person I would have expected to forget that!"

"We are not enemies until the days you have to conquer this planet are up," Tak replied coldly. "A time, I'll remind you, is approaching quickly."

Zim's grimace lasted a few more seconds. "Fine!" he shouted. "I do not care! You may leave your pathetic vessel that you are so attached to in my base until you are able to move it."

"Great! Now make your pathetic self useful and help me put this ship through the warm-up procedures," she instructed. After Zim had climbed into the cockpit, Tak hit the start button.

"_Gah, I hate that spiky-haired-…"_

Pause.

"Hello," Tak said to the ship's dashboard with a wide smile.

"_Hello,_" the ship mirrored in Tak's voice.

"Why don't we fly to Zim's base? I believe you remember where that is."

The ship's antigravity pods caused the ship to levitate about two feet off of the ground, and then the engines started to flare up.

"_Of course, Tak," _the ship answered evenly.

"Estimated time of arrival?" Tak asked, still maintaining her genuine smile.

"_Don't blink._"

**(._.)**

"The Dib will be most displeased when he notices the giant hole in his garage!" Zim informed Tak, and then promptly burst into maniacal laughter. He removed his wig and contacts, and tossed them onto the coffee table. Tak had already deactivated her disguise. "At least you managed to land it properly in my _ingenious… _ship… holdy… roof… _zone._" It almost looked like – what with the success of the evening – that Tak would commit the astounding act of laughing with her worst enemy, but a small wristwatch-shaped communicator on her wrist beeped. Zim glanced at her.

"Yes, MiMi?" Tak asked, squinting at the cat in the little monitor. "Is there something wrong?"

"_Yes! That alien with the massive head broke into our base!" _a little voice squeaked. "_It made off with a few data cards, nothing serious, but it managed to sever the lines to the fusion generator."_

Tak stiffened. "I see. I want you to switch to the shuttle's backup power battery. It will last for a while, and I'll fix the generator later." Her voice was even, but it sounded forced. She tapped the screen, and it turned off. She faced Zim. "_You… _you _tricked_ me."

"Eh… I didn't know that your robot could speak," Zim said, taking an involuntary step backward. He fell due to backing up into his couch, but he didn't really hurt himself by impacting the pillowed surface.

"Yes…" Tak whispered, taking a step closer. "I equipped her with a randomized personality interface kit after recovering her from the warehouse that _they_ threw her in. I wonder how you'd look with your parts separated and thrown into a box…?"

Zim shook his head. "I disagree! Zim would look far better intact!"

"Working with the enemy _again_," Tak muttered. Her hand curled up into a fist. "How I despise _traitors._"

"Really?" Zim shouted. "I don't suppose you minded when I assisted you in recovering your _ship, _did you?"

Tak unceremoniously punched Zim in the face. He stumbled, and fell off of the couch and onto the floor. He stood, however, and raised both hands in self-defense. "Fine! We will solve this with combat!" he yelled.

"Shut up!" Tak roared, and spun her leg around, catching Zim in the shoulder. It pushed him back by a bit, and caused him to grimace in pain. He recovered quickly, and swung his right fist at Tak. She caught his blow, and tried to twist his arm. He pulled away, and kicked at Tak's foot. She tried to dodge it, and stumbled slightly. Zim tried to take advantage of that by punching her, but she caught that punch as well. Zim threw his other fist at her, and she went with the blow with her other hand, and held it there. They were locked in a stalemate, gloved claws intertwined. "You ruined my _life_!" she growled.

"You're trying to kill me!" Zim retorted. He tried to wrench free of Tak's grasp, but she had remarkable finger strength. She pulled him in closer, and tried to push him over. Still locked together, Zim pushed back, and she was forced to back up. Her PAK bonked against the wall, and she grimaced. She roughly kicked Zim in the stomach, and flung him onto the floor. She then proceeded to leap on him, and pepper his body with vicious blows. Zim stopped her at about the fourth solid punch by grabbing her, and trying to hold her still. She wriggled free, but Zim rolled over and then attempted to completely hold her down by the arms. The fury in her eyes burned purple, and she looked as if she wasn't about to surrender, but between Zim's decent grip on her arms, and the fact that she was pinned down, her ability to fight further had been severely limited. Still, she tried to push him to her left side. She failed, but with a sudden spark of hand-to-hand combat enlightenment, she head-butted him directly in the forehead. However, unlike in the films, both of them were equally hurt by the attack. As they were both disoriented – and on top of each other – they probably didn't notice that their lips had touched until a few seconds after the sharp head pain had subsided, and they were once again able to focus on the situation.

However, having someone's lips pressed to one's own is rather a shock when unexpected.

"W-what… the _hell_ is _wrong _with you?" Tak shouted, still pinned down.

Zim quickly edged away from her. "You struck me in the head! It wasn't on purpose!" Zim fired back, now sitting on the floor.

Tak's already blazing eyes narrowed. "Liar," she stated while moving into a sitting position herself.

Zim guffawed. "Why would_ I _ever want to kiss _you_, especially in _this_ kind of situation?"

Tak's eyes still burned with hatred, but they softened slightly. "A kiss? So you admit that it was one?"

"No!" Zim shouted. "Listen _carefully!_"

Tak interrupted his impending tirade by forcibly pressing her lips to his. After a second or two, she broke the contact and resumed her previous position of sitting cross-legged on the floor. Zim's right antenna twitched visibly. Tak appeared just as shocked as he did.

"Why did you just…?" Zim trailed off, staring blankly at Tak.

Tak – for the second time that night, and probably the second time in her life – blushed a deep blue. "I… I only wanted to see if it felt the same!"

Zim mouthed the words she had spoken. "…What is that even supposed to _mean_?" he asked. "You _dare_ toy with _Zim?_"

"No!" Tak said quickly. Her eyes had dulled to embers. "I just wanted to see what it was like the first time, if you know what I'm trying to say!"

"Zim… has… _no idea… _of what you're trying to say," Zim said slowly. "This is insanity! _INSANITY!_"

"Then let us resume the fight!" Tak shouted, leaping up. Zim slowly joined her in an attacking pose. They moved closer.

Zim placed his hands behind her head, and kissed Tak. Tak threw her arms around Zim's, and forcibly pushed them away. Zim's eyes sparkled crimson, and Tak's sparkled violet. Zim's lips parted, as if he was trying to formulate a sentence to speak, but the raw emotion in Tak's eyes may have attributed to his inability to do so. She closed the gap again, and threw her arms around Zim. She looked at Zim with a hard glare, and forcibly continued the action that she had reflexively interrupted by pursuing the kiss hungrily, even going so far as to nearly push Zim over. He pulled away slightly, and while Tak was breathing raggedly, he began peppering her neck with brief kisses. Tak used her chin to push him away, and continued her pushing by forcing him roughly onto the couch. She followed him onto it, and mirrored Zim's interest of his opponent's neck, except by biting it rather than Zim's gentler version of the act. Zim gasped from the unexpected twinge of pain so close in his personal space, and tried to scoot slightly down the sofa in an attempt to free himself from Tak's grasp. However, she ran a gloved claw along the length of his neck in an attempt to prove the futility – and _danger_ – of such an act.

"I hate you," Zim whispered. His arms were pinned neatly against each side of his body.

Tak, wearing the face of an angel that was smiling with sin, laughed. "I hate you more."

**(x_x)**

**[Author's Note:**

**First of all, when Zim says "No, listen carefully," that's actually a Tak quote from her debut episode. Isn't that nice?**

**All right! So, hey, fun fact: Part of this chapter was written while listening to "Touch Too Much" by AC/DC! How great is that? Great song, great song. Yep. Go listen to it **_**after writing a carefully thought out and constructive review.**_

**MAN!**

_**I'M GREAT WITH KNOWING WHERE TO END CHAPTERS, RIGHT?**_

_**I KNOW!**_

**~CWO]**


	9. We Love to Hate

Sparkles of warmth from sunlight splashing in through Zim's windows were enough to awaken him. After blinking a few times to help the sleep dissipate, he couldn't help but notice that he was on the floor. He curled slightly and then pulled himself up into a sitting position. He shifted his gaze down, and absently ran his right hand across the carpet. He inspected his hand curiously. It was ungloved.

Zim absently scratched the back of his neck, but he recoiled at the sudden, sharp pain. He gingerly felt along his neck, and noticed a few cuts that led from the side of his neck to about halfway down his shoulders.

Still carefully examining the extent of his mild injuries, he forced his mind to wander back to the previous night. His already quick heartbeat sped up further when he suddenly noticed a familiar enemy fast asleep on his couch. He scrambled to his feet, and glanced furiously about for his gloves, still trying to remember. He exhaled and closed his eyes in relief. Nothing _too_ horrible had happened. They'd… 'fought'… but then they'd just managed to collapse from exhaustion.

Zim found a pair of gloves strewn on the floor just to the left of the couch, and put them on quickly. After a few seconds, he wiggled his fingers. Something was… off. It dawned on him. He quickly plucked them off of his hands and dropped them back on the floor, all the while handling them as an object of distaste. Those gloves had been Tak's. He glanced around, and he confirmed his hunch that the correct pair of gloves had somehow managed to slip under the sofa. He plucked them from underneath, and hastily started slipping them on, starting with the right. He breathed a sigh of relief. It fit like a glove – at least they were his this time.

Tak yawned, and shifted slightly. Staring down at her, Zim pulled his left glove down with his right hand, and released it with a satisfying snap. Through half-lidded eyes, he contemplated how best he could murder her. While tapping thoughtfully on his chin with his index finger was proving to be a fantastic way to expand on his plot, he began drifting from it upon seeing the condition that Tak was in. The snow white skin and blueberry hair were absent, and instead he glanced over a pale emerald-colored body, dressed in its favorite purple uniform. Tak's left antenna twitched, and as if in response to some unknown force bidding her to do so, she rolled over slightly. Her right arm was dangling casually over the arm of the couch, and one of the legs of her nearly skin-tight military-grade pants was pushed up slightly, revealing a bit of a leg that ended in a delicate foot.

Zim glanced around the room once more, and saw her discarded left boot just near the entrance to the kitchen. He rolled his eyes and took the few steps required to make it there. He bent over, awakening a few pinpricks of pain in his back. Snatching the boot and bringing it back to the sofa had proved easy enough, but he blankly wondered what he would do with it. He placed the boot on the floor next to the couch, and shrugged.

"Mmmph…" Tak moaned. After she began curling up with her arms crossed around her stomach, Zim briefly wondered if she was dying, but dismissed it as wishful thinking. "Yes… truly an invader… sweets…" she whispered, still clutching her belly for some reason. "Of course I… at least this shows… thank you…" She tensed slightly, and her right hand sought purchase on a pillow. "I should… shouldn't have…" Apparently Zim had gotten too close out of curiosity, because Tak's left hand grabbed Zim by the shirt and drew him in further. "Stealing _this_ planet from…" she snarled quietly, but trailed off. Her grip slackened, and her left arm fell limp against the side of the couch. "Zim…" she said softly.

Zim smoothed the front of his uniform while maintaining a hard expression.

"Zim," she repeated quietly, holding her arms against her chest. She squirmed a little bit, but settled down with her back facing him.

"I found the cupcake!" GIR screamed from behind Zim, who nearly fell over from the sudden noise. He spun around, and noticed that GIR was holding one of his specially designed floating cupcakes.

"GIR, put that cupcake back in the dispenser immediately!" Zim ordered. After GIR scampered off, completely oblivious to Zim's irritation – and most likely his instructions – Zim turned back around to be greeted by Tak, who was about an inch away from his face. "You're awake."

"Yes, I'm awake," Tak spat. Her purple eyes glanced around shiftily. "What the _hell_ did you do to me?"

"Nothing!" Zim snapped.

Tak quickly noticed her ungloved hands, and snatched her gloves and boot off of the ground, and hastily fit them all on. She paused, and glared back up at Zim. "Now I remember. You _deceived_ me with that pointy-haired monkey as your accomplice!"

Zim started grinding his teeth. "He acted on his own, I swear it. I would never work with that pathetic human worm!"

Mulling over his response, Tak made sure her boot was secure. "You worked with him the last time I was here," she retorted, but her expression had already softened. She glanced up at Zim. "Don't you have to prepare for the school thing?"

"It is Saturday," Zim said coolly.

"I knew that," Tak muttered. "I can't believe I… I fell asleep here. MiMi will be worried sick."

"Yes!" Zim said. "Make your excuses, Tak. Oh, how amazed you will be when you see the glorious plan that will be unleashed by me, _Zim!_"

Tak glared at Zim again. "I didn't ask about your damn 'plan'," she growled, using air quotes. "And I most certainly am not making any excuses for any reason!" She stood up quickly, causing Zim to stumble back slightly. "You," she hissed, poking him in the ribs, "are running out of time, _invader_. You'd better watch yourself, becau-…" she trailed off, and stared at Zim's neck. "I don't remember that," she said absently.

Zim protectively felt the cuts along his neck. "Well, you inflicted them," he said behind narrowed eyes.

Tak blushed slightly. "Oh, yes. Now I remember. It was after… well…"

"After we began to kiss," Zim said flatly.

Tak grimaced. "I… I'm leaving!"

"Good," Zim muttered, waving to the door dismissively.

Tak stared at him. "I hate you!" she yelled, and made for the door.

After the door was closed with a resounding slam, Zim plopped down on the couch. The thoughts of his newest – and, perhaps, last plan if Tak had anything to say about it – were shattered when he caught the scent of blueberries. In response, he snatched one of the sofa's pillows, flung it across the room, and then stormed into the kitchen for the express purpose of locking himself in his lab for the next several hours.

"Tak," he growled. "I'm going to _win_ this…"


	10. Sweet Victory

Several days without speaking to each other had taken their toll when Zim and Tak stared at each other on the bus. It was Tuesday, and neither of them had been at school the previous day. The suspicion was nearly tangible.

"Zim," Tak acknowledged grimly, plopping down beside him with a sour expression.

Zim nodded, and focused his attention out of the window. "I'm beginning my plan today."

Tak glanced at him. "Really? You only get one chance, you know."

Zim rolled his eyes. "I know," he said flatly.

Tak began tapping her foot, and sharply glared at Zim. "My shuttle recognized an Irken ship moving near Earth. I think they might have discovered that I'm here."

Zim smirked, but then resumed his blank gazing out of the window. "As fortunate for me that would be, that's not why they showed."

Tak studied the back-right side of Zim's head. "How do you know?" she asked, voice quiet and steeped with suspicion. She had tensed up visibly.

"I had to order something," Zim said matter-of-factly, and turned to Tak with a smirk.

The bus stopped abruptly, but Tak barely moved; she just stood up and kept up a blank expression as she disembarked, closely followed by the rest of the students in the bus. When she had nearly reached the door, she felt a hand grab her arm. She spun around to face Zim. "What do you want?" she hissed.

Zim stared at her with a blank expression until the small crowd of students from the buses had dissipated. Then, he smirked. "I am merely wondering if you would let me show you something."

Tak jerked away from Zim, breaking the uncomfortable contact. Her two footsteps echoed against the flat cement bus drop-off area. "Unless it has to do with your plan, I don't want anything to do with you," she snapped, tearing her eyes from him. She focused them on the brick wall of the side of the cafeteria. She glanced back at him when there was no response.

"It does have to do with my plan!" Zim protested. He glanced up at the sky briefly, and then focused on Tak.

Tak furrowed her brow and glanced up at the sky. It was gray; clouds were brewing up for what looked like a storm. She bowed her head for a moment and sighed. "Fine. The sooner you fail horribly, the sooner I'll be able to be rid of you for good."

"Excellent. We're going to the roof."

"The roof?"

**(._.)**

A small metallic shuffle came from the handle of the exterior roof door as Zim pushed through it with a smirk. He held it open for Tak, who unenthusiastically brushed past him. Her eyes widened when she looked around the rooftop.

"It's… a garden," she said flatly.

It was true. Down the stairs from the exit to the roof, a portion of the main building had been set up as a garden – small plants were growing in their specified patches, and little signs designating their species were placed near them.

"Yes," Zim said from behind her, nodding his head. He let the door shut behind him. "The horticultural club had to do their horticulturing somewhere. But that's not important right now." He snapped his fingers.

Tak glanced behind her with a distasteful expression. "Zim, please. What on Irk are you doing?"

"Come now, Tak," Zim said, lowering his recently-snapped hand. He grinned, and pointed to a speaker just above the door they had exited. "Can't you hear it?"

"What?" Tak asked, staring at Zim as if he had grown a third antenna. "I'm beginning to think you've gone insane."

Zim grimaced suddenly, and started tapping his foot. "You'd like that, wouldn't you? All of you. You make me sick," he growled. "Still. The façade. I must maintain it; I must keep it going for everyone to _see…_" He spun around quirkily, and started stretching his arms repeatedly. "_All_ of you," he repeated. "Laughingstock of the Irken Empire, eh? They'll see…"

"You… _knew?_" Tak asked, taking a careful step backward, suddenly mindful of the small staircase behind her.

"Oh, of _course…_" Zim hissed. He absently removed his wig and dropped it on the floor. "Still… I couldn't pass up the opportunity. Once I figured it out – can't believe it took me so long… stupid, stupid, _stupid_ – I played the ignorance card. If I failed, who would care?" he asked, arms outstretched. "No one!" He continued pacing around in a small fraction of the roof. "Can't you hear it?" he asked again, staring at Tak with pleading eyes.

"Hear… hear what?" Tak asked, shaking her head.

"Ah, but if I succeeded…" Zim said, ignoring her completely, "…I'd win!" He started giggling to himself, tongue lolling out of his mouth goofily. He frowned, cleared his throat, and regained his composure rather quickly. "I know you hear it now," he said eerily, glaring at Tak with his glowing eyes. "Don't lie."

The sky had darkened rather quickly, and the clouds were almost black at that point. Tak was about to respond, but she heard a tinny reproduction of some woodwind instruments being played from somewhere. She glanced at the PA speaker above the door just as it began to play a harp.

"I… I hear it," Tak whispered, suddenly completely and utterly confused.

The brass section started up slowly.

After glancing at the sky for a moment, Zim smiled. "Tchaikovsky," he explained. "The Waltz of the Flowers. How… appropriate." He extended a hand toward Tak, to which Tak answered with a grimace. "It's a waltz, Tak," Zim added.

"Th-this is your plan? To _dance_?" Tak asked, eying his hand suspiciously.

"No," Zim replied with a frown. He let his hand drop. "I'm here to show you Earth."

She stared at him just as the music began rising in volume. She blinked when she felt something land lightly on her head. Tak frowned, and plucked the tiny thing out of her hair. It was a tiny fleck of something.

"Is that… snow?" Tak asked, looking at the small white item.

Zim smiled. "It's confectioner's sugar."

Tak's expression blanked completely at his answer. Suddenly, a bolt of purple lightning exploded across the sky. She nearly leaped into the air.

Zim started laughing maniacally as he descended the stairs. His arms were outstretched as more sugar – because that's what it was, pure and simple, _sugar_! – began falling down from the sky. "By the Tallest, by the Tallest, by the Tallest," he repeated, voice cracking. He paused on the stairs. "Oh, let me see it…" He removed his contacts and dropped them in his wig. He left them on the stairs, and continued walking down. "M-my greatest work… _completed…!_"

After he had loosed another laugh, Tak chased after him. "What's wrong with you?" she shouted. "What are you doing…? _Sugar?_ Earth?"

"Oh, not just sugar. I've synthesized some cuh-_razy_ elemental juice that produces all manner of sweet things in the atmosphere," he whispered, staring expectantly at the sky. "And in about an hour, we'll all be burning in a sea of boiling caramel. In addition, the gravity well synthesizers I've put into orbit will keep any vessels from entering or leaving the atmosphere. Oh, and it's irreversible."

Tak's jaw dropped, and she took a step backward. "Y-you… you've doomed us all."

"Yes…" Zim murmured, smiling as the waltz continued. "Consider it a punishment for coming back."

"You… you bastard…" she hissed. "You defective scum… trash… filth…"

"Insult me all you wish, Tak," Zim said, extending his palms toward her in a gesture of mock peace. "It won't matter."

Tak frowned, and was silent for a few seconds. "You're right. It won't."

Another bolt of lightning lit up the sky as sugar continued falling.

"And the chorus swells!" Zim cheered, a look of unstable bliss overtaking his facial features. He spun around happily as Tak made her way down the stairs after him.

She sighed, and glanced disdainfully at a tomato plant. "Zim… you've won," she said blankly, softly rubbing the side of her face as if she'd been slapped. "I had planned to kill you whether your plan succeeded or not."

"Naturally," Zim interrupted with a smirk.

Tak glared at him. "I didn't expect you to destroy the planet," she muttered, pacing around in response to Zim's pseudo-dancing.

"It's mine to destroy," Zim commented, with a knowing nod of his head.

Tak's hand curled up into a fist. "You have no right to say that…" she hissed, causing Zim to quit his celebrating. In response to his expectant expression, she added, "It should be _my _planet."

"We all know how your last attempt ended," Zim said dismissively. "It's mine."

Tak slammed her fist into the side of Zim's head; he crashed into a small shrub. After getting up shakily, he glared at her while holding his jaw.

"You've ruined my reputation, my goal in life, and my good standing in the empire," Tak began, slowly approaching Zim. "You've taken away my mission twice, you've gotten me thrown into prison, and now you're about to take my life – even if it is along with yours and everyone else's on this planet." She was about two inches away from him, and ready to strike again, but then she slowly let her arms go to her sides. "But I don't care," she murmured.

Zim stared blankly at her. "Eh?"

"I don't care," Tak repeated.

"Eh?" Zim asked again, still obviously confused.

Tak stared at Zim, face completely free of any glaring or grimacing. "None of it really mattered. I see that now." She smiled. She actually _smiled._ And it was genuine. "That… that story you told me; the sad one about your neighbor."

"Yes?" Zim asked.

"I see why you told that to me, as well." She shook her head. "Emotions. If the Tallest could see me now."

More sugar spiraled past them.

"Emotions…" Tak repeated softly, breaking off from her pseudo-faceoff with Zim. She walked over to the small stairs and sat down on one of them. Zim joined her soon afterward. "Now that I'm going to die, thanks to you…" she added grimly, "I suppose nothing I do from here onward matters." She glanced at Zim. "If that is the case…" She quickly embraced Zim, and buried her head on his shoulder while he stared at her blankly with wide, surprised eyes. Her body shook slightly, and right away Zim could recognize the motion as the very un-Irkenlike practice of crying.

"Eh…" Zim said, trying to shy away from Tak slightly, but failing. He patted her back twice with a guarded expression. "There, there… Tak…?"

_Sniff._ "Irkens aren't supposed to feel," Tak whispered, lifting her head to wipe off her tears with her hand.

"Oh, yes. That's terrible," Zim murmured, unsuccessfully attempting to slip out from Tak's grasp.

"Does that mean I'm… well, defective?" Tak asked with wide eyes.

Zim frowned. "Emotions can't be avoided, but they can be renamed," he said weakly. "Most Irkens will feel hatred, envy, pride, or sadness. Some might even be happy one day."

"Never expected _you_ to be a philosopher," Tak spat, breaking off from him quickly. "Maybe I'm not done feeling hatred."

"'Nothing I do from here onward matters'," Zim quoted.

Tak cursed silently, and turned to Zim. "Maybe… maybe I don't want to hate anymore."

Zim stared at her as she fitted her hand in his.

"Why do you do that?" Zim asked, shaking his head.

Tak frowned, and pulled her hand away. "Do what?"

"You… you kissed me, and… you hate me. You hate me, but then you do things like that," Zim muttered quickly, eyes darting between the black sky and Tak's gaze. "I am wondering if you are attracted to me in some way."

Tak blushed, and glanced the other direction. "Yes, well, that might be a decent hypothesis. Now that nothing matters, I'll have no problem confirming it."

"Why?" Zim asked flatly.

"Because you're an idiot, and ruined my life for the better if that makes any sense. I could've conquered Earth and moved on to another planet entirely, maybe… but, sooner or later, I'd either be called out of service or killed by the enemy," she said blankly. "I don't see the point in it anymore."

"I hated you for trying to steal my mission," Zim commented. He stood up and smoothed his shirt. "The mighty Zim is victorious once again!" he called. He withdrew a communicator-looking device attached by a few metal parts out of his PAK while Tak watched him blankly. "GIR, bring the shuttle over."

After a few high-pitched chattering noises from the other end, he hung up. After about twenty seconds of complete silence – apart from the raging sugarstorm around them, anyway – the familiar whine of the engines of the very shuttle that Tak had used to get back to Earth were heard just off of the roof of the school. Tak and Zim watched as the ship landed on the roof near them, and the hatch on the side opened.

"Hiya!" GIR squeaked, bright green in his dog disguise.

"Good work, GIR," Zim noted, beckoning for Tak to enter the vehicle. She did so, looking dazed from the recent events and her fresh confusion.

After her expression showed that she was just going to go with whatever was happening, Zim nodded at GIR who nodded at MiMi. She was sitting in the pilot's seat, and promptly flew the ship away from the school.

"MiMi…" Tak began. "Why are you flying this shuttle for Zim?"

"They offered me a deal," MiMi replied.

Tak was taken aback. "What… kind of deal?"

"I am to bring you to Zim's base," MiMi said grimly.

**(._.)**

"Welcome to my lab, Tak. I don't believe you've been down here before," Zim muttered.

Tak stomped unhappily into the room from the elevator. "I have no idea what's going on, and I don't think that even your lab is enough to withstand an ocean of boiling caramel."

"You misunderstand, Tak. This is all according to my plan," he said flatly, now quickly typing Irken characters into the computer. He pressed the submit key with a resounding clack.

"_Project 'Sweet Victory' terminated,_" the computer said tiredly. "_Gravity well system offline; atmospheric modification offline._"

"You said it was irreversible," Tak whispered.

"I lied."

_Beep beep beep._

"_Incoming message from the Almighty Tallest – they care about _you!_" _the computer recited sarcastically. "_As this is a priority call, they will be patched through automatically._"

"_Zim!" _Red shouted. Red and Purple had appeared on Zim's computer screen. _"We've just received news that Tak was heading to your Earth planet thing, and we th-… she's there," _he said blankly.

Zim cleared his throat. "Oh, no, Tak, please!" he shouted pleadingly. "Don't stab me!"

Red's left antenna twitched, and the call went directly to static.

"Computer, be sure to add the Almighty Tallest to the 'approve before beginning call' list," Zim remarked, dropping the screaming act.

"_Yeah, sure,_" the computer replied.

"Would you please tell me what is going on?" Tak asked.

Zim smirked. "I've carried out my plan," he explained, sitting down in the computer chair, apparently exhausted. "I've made you stop wanting to kill me, I've made the Tallest assume that we'll kill each other, and I've also prevented them from finding it necessary to send military forces out to recapture you."

Tak – not for the first time that day – was completely and utterly confused. "Why?"

"Because that way, I win. Oh, and I think I could like someone that's so much like myself; so, that too," he added with a wide smile.

"You tricked me!" Tak yelled.

"No, I didn't!" Zim yelled back, practically leaping out of his chair. "Besides, even your robot knew this was for the best!"

"'For the best'? You don't decide what's best for me! Last time I checked, we were worst enemies!"

"Last time _I_ checked, we've kissed and you've openly proclaimed your love for me!"

"You misinterpreted my words!"

"Liar!"

"Idiot!"

"Silence!"

There was a pause.

Tak rolled her eyes, and grinned. "Thank you." She took a step closer to Zim.

"Victory for Zim," he chirped.

**(._.)**

"Man, that sugar-snow sure was crazy; huh, Gaz?" Dib asked from the sofa. "I wonder how Zim is doing with that plan of his… something horrible, I'll bet! I'll have to stop it once he… how much time did he have? Oh, whatever." He absently sucked on his drink, and flipped to the channel that he had been searching for just as the Mysterious Mysteries introduction sequence started. "Gaz, do you think that Tak and Zim could've somehow made up and started plotting together or something? They are _aliens_, after all…"

Silence.

Dib glanced behind him and scanned the empty room. "Gaz?"

More silence.

Dib slumped down unhappily in the couch and sighed. "I have got to stop talking to myself."

**End.**


End file.
